Category: Life

Shed Light..

Someone to Scream for

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Someone scream for the little girl inside of her.

 

Mothering everyone’s problems.

 

Yearning to be held by her own, and switch back the roles.

 

Life has never been easy.

 

She witnessed a life of rage.

Endured every form of abuse.

And is now her own emotional slave.

 

Someone scream for the woman she’ll grow to be.

 

3 little pigs, life doesn’t knock like the wolves, it continues to blow down houses but her foundation is strong.

 

She houses all the issues, she replaces their dirty laundry with clean clothes. As she tries forcefully feed them gentle honesty.

 

The little engine that could, pride and determination pushing her through college.

 

Someone scream for the wife, she will later become.

 

A heart filled with aches and stitches.

A nose accustom to uncensored scent of bullshit.

Emotions used for pleasure and ignored through pain.

Still she is enriched with hope, making sure no ill will is accompanying her.

 

Someone scream for the mother in the sister she’s always provided.

 

She’s just trying to find her self and profess good examples.

Allow them to recognize that she encounters obstacles daily.

Even through all the stress, she puts time away to listen.

 

Someone scream for the daughter she is.

 

This apple has grown beautifully, because of her family tree.

And although it may not fall far from the tree, she rolls and explores the grass engraving her own path.

 

Someone scream for the friend in her.

 

She’s building walls, while they’re caring less.

Allow her to acknowledge the ones around her are replacing each brick with trust.

That if she falls off her ladder, she recognizes the ones that catch her, before she falls, and if they miss….

Aid in cleaning her up.

 

Someone scream for this young lady, because she can’t seem to do it herself.

She has been so busy screaming for everyone else, she lost her voice, and her lost breath….

 

So scream to comfort her —

on her mission to find herself.

 

-Leighrick

The Tree That Fell in the City

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I’m about as ungrateful as impatient can get me.

The type that forgets hospitals exist when I am sick.

And often times, I wish there was only 6.

Like maybe there’d be some balance if the odd didn’t exist.

Fixated on my crowded loneliness.

Wiping my tears as I reminiscence.

Trying to find the “I” in dependent, bout as hard as it gets.

So I sip & I twist.

 

I have dwelled with the premature & tolerated pre-Madonnas.

I’ve disguised my pride and dressed my thoughts.

Been on the same page as many, but rarely ever the same book.

I have mistaken blessings for a curses.

Let go of my ego for equality,

Breaking fast for fallen soldiers in the army of humanity, in the war of morality.

Experienced the experiment of genocide.

Ive stayed inside to hide, then stood tall when no one was around.

Smiled, when inside it’s a frown.

Often –

I walk with my head down.

 

Until then,

The pen personifies my motives.

The paper organizes my thoughts into origami, shifting shapes into my alter persona.

A schizophrenic Gemini, filled with personality, conflicted by decision.

I put my hand up for a time-out but this motion picture, illiterate to intermissions.

Ticketed oppression.

 

I digress.

Throw my hands up in confession

“I’m not who you think I am!” —

My soul goes deeper than my reflection.

Complacency is more effortless than depression.

Independence has a currency, Protection.

 

Some say, “Money makes the world go ’round“, but

Its a recession.

So has the world withheld movement?

Funny we think it revolves around us, but

We’re no where close to the moon.

See the solar system?

In my souls there’s a system,

Replace uncertainty with Faith.

Everything lives & everyone dies.

 

You see,

This world might seem cold, and soon these storm clouds will turn to rain.

Meaning — I am the sun that will shine,

As you fret and precipitate, my words will ease the pain.

For every smile there’s 100 times the drops of rain.

So plant your seed, and let the roots dig deeper than what the eyes can see, the hand can touch, and the heart can feel.

Become one with your growth, but never be the one to cut down a tree.

Just because their still doesn’t mean they don’t scream.

….

Did you hear it?

 

-Leighrick

Visual Letter : To Whom It May Concern

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Dear Reader,

Shut your eyes to the world, but open them wide for my thoughts.
Stop allowing the background noise to interfere.
Channel my voice.
Read this poem alone.

          I’ve been echoing the same message. I’ve been screaming for someone to catch me as I am falling, and it still hasn’t happened. It’s true what they say, “you are your own worse enemy“. If you feel like your alright now….you’re not.

          I am the best at mental hide-n-go-seek, because I’ve been lost inside my mind for years now. No one has found me and I wonder sometimes if anyone is even looking. Would they know what or who to look for? — I’ve tricked myself, I set a trap and I fell for it. I fell forward into a sea of misunderstandings, and now I’m drowning.
No wonder I Love the beach…

          I have convinced myself I was happy, because Love had found me. Now I feel as though it is a facade and I am witnessing it deteriorating…right-in-front-of-my-face.

          Everyone is acting as enemies, but to their convince they shape up and play for the same team. They yell, curse, presuade, manipulate, downsize, lack faith…What they don’t know is I’ve already beaten them to it. I’ve been doing this to myself all these years, no wonder the real me is hiding.

 

Don’t stop reading yet…

I need someone to vent to.

 

          Writing is all I got, even though people have the ability to read they still don’t understand my lingo. I wonder do you understand my message? When you read this do you see a motion picture taking place in your head? Can you see me stressing, running out of ways to keep my sanity?!

Picture this: Imagine me in a room, locked door, and sealed windows. Laying on an air-mattress, floating in a pool of ink. Forever laying in a bed without the ability to sleep. IM SUPPOSE TO BE HAPPY. Supposedly that’s what everyone wants for me. I don’t see that shit though, their double standards are about as consistent as when the wind blows. I suppose some of a little bit is true.

          I’ll just remain being happy under everyone’s conditions; I dont know how they didnt pick up on it. All my poems are little clues. At least one person picked up on em, but he pushes me away too. Then again I am he, and he is me…so I guess in an essence it’s just me hiding from myself again. I don’t know when he’ll realize that he is my reflection, or that whenever any type of stress is present, we’re both in pain.

          I’ve learned this Love is serious, and every time an obstacle presented its self we got through it. We celebrated, after the 5min party, we retreat back into the darkness. Day light savings, we fall back, so the light doesnt remain long.

          Basically, what the fuck I am trying to say is, my mind is a Jail. I am stuck, no bail. Handcuffed to the bars of my cell, so i turned my phone off. I dont want any visitors.

 

…That’s all I guess, this piece was pretty pointless. I hope my words provided pictures. So when you see me smile, you know its not genuine. These poems are all tears from when I cry..A cry for help, to find myself inside my mind.

          Hopefully when you took this glance throughout my thought process. You got a little glimpse of the lost Candace, and you can tell me where to look next.

–Leighrick

Pocket Change

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Green grass, white fences, blue skies, soft kisses.
All make for sweet dreams…
Shooting stars, coins in ponds, eleven twice on a clock.
All make for big wishes….
Broken hearts, negative thoughts, “I didn’t mean..”
All make for used tissues….

Which all these make for deep rooted issues.

We love to hate love, but we hate to miss it.
We love to love love, and still we miss it.

In that green grass there’s dead flowers,
Beyond that fence is a new house.
In the blue skies there are rain clouds.
Beyond the lips of soft kisses there is passion.

Identify us together, but who are you to me?

Shooting stars wound the night.
Coins in ponds may be the change sought by a vagabond.
11:11…awaiting Good Mornings and Good Nights.

I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish I knew how to decipher what I write….

Broken hearts can be healed, but will always be flawed.
Negative thoughts replenish positive ambitions.
I didn’t mean to get too deep, only to give you something to read.

The needle in the haystack isn’t hiding, and the elephant in the room is just a figurine.

-Leighrick

Water

Posted in Dapper Suits, Life, Pieces of Poetry, Poetic RenegadeTagged , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

Some asked me once before if I could be anything or anyone in the world, what would it be?

The Answer:

 

Water.

 

When I’m stressed…

I take shots,

breaking down trees.

…

Clarity is what I thirst for,

And my fears are starving my needs.

 

I don’t want to feel a thing,

And the liquor doesn’t ask questions.

My world is dark and cold for a minute,

But the numbness wont last.

 

I can’t see past the smoke,

I can only see the past.

But still, the trees don’t talk back.

 

I rest my head

on whatever will

keep it up at the moment.

 

My regrets are too heavy,

My thoughts moving in slow motion.

 

Burdens buried me under

Brownish-Green meadows

Of melancholy.

My bed sailing down

Rivers of Rum.

 

I see the light,

but it’s burning my eyes.

To my demise,

I can hear God laughing

at my home remedies.

 

Last night,

He turned his blood into

this bottle of wine.

And my faith adapted strength.

 

Last night,

He turned these munchies

Into Food for Thought,

And my knowledge gained weight.

 

This morning,

I woke up,

Hand scanned the surfaces.

Until it came upon a glass of clarity,

And alas…

I was replenished.

 

-Leighrick

When the Hands Touch

Posted in Dapper Suits, Initations, Life, Love, Pieces of PoetryTagged , , , , , , Leave a comment

I lifted my hand to raise the bar,

You lifted your hand with anger to discharge.

 

Flirting with poetic justice behind these thin bars.

It kills me to see this love dying.

 

 it’s even worse knowing I’m a part.

 

We started a garden, and you’ve mistreated our seeds.

It takes a city to raise a tree,

and a village to nurture their growth successfully.

 

To look at you is gruesome.

 

How did we split ways like X, come together, then arrive at an end like Z.

 

Furthermore,

Who am I to say?…the least

Who am I if I stay?

 

 I spread my wings as that of a seagull;

Heading towards the Bay because I see goals I’m striving to obtain.

 

 That I put behind your pride,

The same position you left the knife in my back.

Ashamed.

 

I rose to realize your lies and I were laying one in the same.

Instead I laid with my loves, our hearts one in the same.

 

You appear once again, at the crossroads of Insane and Who to blame.

Blame it on the Alcohol, the Girls, the Weed, just not Me.

 

You can point two fingers, but those other six aren’t pointed towards Me.

 

We were the arrows, when you felt lost

We pointed back, leaving you an open seat.

You chose paths before day broke.

 

is it the money?

 

Funny,

I wouldn’t pay a penny out of my 2-sense for a dollar worth of your thoughts.

Looking for a quarter figure in a dime worth no more then a nickel.

 

Money makes the world go round,

You’re circling betrayal chasing behind confusion.

This disillusion is far more real than what you can fathom, and still have yet to feel.

 

When the pain kicks in,

I hope the waters overflow the sky;

Allowing me to taste your tears in the raindrops during my parade.

 

I know your up there hiding somewhere…

 

Gone.

 

–Leighrick

Goodnight Never Goodbye

Posted in Life, Pieces of PoetryTagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , 2 Comments

This is Real.

The hurt in my chest,

the plugged ears,

the consistency of tears.

My cries for some understanding.

—

Unanswered.

Deceit has sent me overboard.

Like a coward my arms could no longer bare the burden of my heart, my mind, and his words.

Regrettably —

I have no life vest.

I fell off and into what I thought was a puddle;

Except the more agony I felt, the more the water swallowed my body.

The most meaningful attribute to life, tasteful but bittersweet.

Every time a thought of you crosses, mini movies of recollections replay,

and the pain in my heart is replenished.

Lost in a sea of  crocodile tears, swollen eyes, a gorged nose, and a heartbroken by life.

Actualize a racing mind.

Time is drowning me in my own emo-ocean.

Much time is given, yet I feel like sailing out my mind.

Envision

Fishing with the thoughts of regrets, and Paragliding with reminiscence.

Through a Cold War, actions often kill, but

Love is stronger than death.

Despite love being uncontrollable, no matter how hard death tries it cannot intervene people in love.

Love is stronger than death, although it can’t stop death from happening, no matter how hard death tries it can’t separate people from love.

Therefore,

Death cannot take away memories either.

In the end, love is always stronger.

So you see —

A part of you has grown in me.

Allowing me to  cease the worries, raise up, and stand strong

It’s you and me together like time and eternity

and never afar,

maybe in distance,

but never by heart.

Goodnight I say,

Never a Goodbye.

–Leighrick