Real Life, Still Life

Do you ever feel like your art is a person?

Every time I write a piece, I’m painting a self portrait. In the present tense or even as the third person. On the outside looking in — the pain your emerged in.

Hearing a song you never wrote like the artist is someone you grew up with. The happiness you told all your secrets to, but the sadness is holding you hostage.

I always wonder why people try to bargain with death. Its wins eventually, until there’s no one left. Selling dreams of living in clouds, Eternal luxury with no evidence; living for a better tomorrow. That promise isn’t kept.

I live like today is my last, often that’s why it seems I only care about my self.

Who am I kidding?!

I care for everyone else. My heart is a clinic, get in if you fit in, no matter the health. Sympathies nursing sorrows. Empathy injecting psychedelic morrows. Where do I go when I need love? I pull out a cool J and fill my chest like I’m getting lung transplants tomorrow.

When I’m chasing my breath, the loneliness is easier to swallow. Why does everyone want to be understood? Judgment is the mass a murderer. How could you even point your finger at my chest when you’ve never felt my soles?

Non-believers. For whom I hope on Christmas all get coal. I pack pens like heat, cause this world gets cold. Equipped qith a paper machete. Just because you scream “F– The World!” Doesn’t make you bold.

Dark minds, I meditate inhaling white lights to shine upon the spirits journey through my mind. Trying to apprehend my thoughts from the graps of confusion. There’s a hole in my mind, I guess that’s where all the memories go.

A missing piece. Trying to find a peace of mind, so if I don’t remember you, don’t be offended. That’s just called letting go…

I’m feeling more attached by a cord an some earphones. I’ve know you all my life and look how far we’ve grown, Apart.

This may be the start to a natural disaster. I put the yield sign up, and you chose to keep going. I put up some emotional roadblocks across, but you ignored the caution stories and crossed the lines. Now we’ve come to a complete stop. Feel our foundation shaking beneath us. Is this my fault because I didn’t stunt my growth? I didn’t stop the towing? I came to a fork in the road, it said “You Left ” & “Life Right”.

What else was I suppose to do besides keep going?

This piece can keep going. I’ve only finished the eyes. Those are the windows to peek through if you really want to know me.

But — I’ll finish this Self portrait later. I just wanted to paint the picture, so you could get the point of view as to why I’m struggling growing. And I bet by the time I finish this masterpiece, you still won’t be able to recognize the Real Me.

Leighrick

WWYD?

What if the joy of yesterday encounters sorrows of tomorrow?

Would you smile because you’ve seen another day, or complain because the smile you had has been borrowed?

Cliche as it may seem, be grateful for what you have.

Many children have never seen the light beyond the womb, and many people only known the comfort in the darkness of a tomb.

What if Doom’s Day was yesterday? and Today Hell froze over.

Would you shed a tear for the lost ones, or bask in the triumph with the other surviving soldiers?

This is a catch-22

You can’t control whether you win or you lose – Life is crazy like that. I saw it killing on the news, I heard it singing in the blues, I could taste it’s celebration in homemade stew.

I’ve held it in my arms, and in the morning I smell it in the dew.

Life proposed these questions, now I am asking them to you.

What Would You Do?

-Leighrick

Words Involving You

Lately, I can’t seem to take the “i” out of Pain. Instead I try and focus on the word “believe”, but I couldnt get over the fact within that word is the word “lie”. What is belief without Truth?
At night I go outside, sit on my porch with my hoodie on my head, and star gaze.
Blowing smoke in-disguise.
The person I have the potential to be is unrecognizable. Somehow tho, she is the person every one see’s when looking at me. I see glimpses, but it seems evident to everyone except me. I wonder – Is this about accepting? Could be I too busy worrying about protection? After all failure is inevitable, and when it all falls down I must pick my self up.
Ultimately, I have discovered that Faith is one of the greatest test in life. I noticed that all of these words have an “I” in it as well. You see often doubt is captivating; however, I refuse to imprison myself. I tried asking myself what’s better, critiquing the game or playing it for yourself?
Then I answered…..

-Leighrick