Offically Missing You

I’m lost confused as to what to do.
Sometimes I wish you could just walk a couple steps in my shoes,
Feel the pain I’m feeling from how much I’m missing you.
And I swear that’s sayings true, cause you cannot have the cake if your trying to eat it too.
Meaning I can not be your lover, only a homie…not even your boo.
Yet I continue to baby you.
Through and through, and through and through…I’ve met plenty of dudes, but can’t progress cause I stay comparing them to you.
It hurts because you love her, they love you, and I’m just here helping you get through it all.
I do things I don’t do, I say things I don’t say,
I’ve distanced myself from others, longing to have you one of these days, but your routine stays the same.
You don’t know what your feeling, through one ear and out the other…
through one year passes another and I’m still not with you.
People begging me, pleading for me to leave you, and
I inch away retracing my steps right back…
I’m breaking my back and your hardly bending yours.
Yours, Mines, Ours forever …we say–
I’m yours and your mine…
that’s how I wake up each morning, with a reoccurring dream hoping life has changed.
Either me not loving you, or you finally recognizing me…

Hopefully it’s not too late, and you’ve become either a mistake or stay a dream.
Our relationship is getting sicker, because it’s only me participating
yet my feelings get thicker, and you present yourself
here and there…
I still don’t see you.
In the beginning we started off solid, oblivious as to when life would hit…
But it did, hard
Because I feel, I’m the only one living through this
You’re not yourself and for sometime you’ve been missing.

I guess this poem is a point to say that I’m Officially Missing You.
-Leighrick

Ace of Hearts

I’ve felt the ground beneath my feet

I’ve felt the cloud in my palms,

Journeyed through Satan’s temple, and

Witnessed the gates guarding heavens doors —

All while loving you.

This isn’t easy baby,

I work hard to be sure you’re happy, and

It’s like you don’t even need me, baby

Have you thought about life without me?

I dream many nights you disappeared, but

Within them I lost myself en route to you.

I think I know you love me.

When you mistreat me, and  mislead me,

it makes it hard to see.

It’s hard loving you baby, but giving up is too easy.

Now your fading, fading, fading…

I find myself hugging you; really it’s just the photographs.

I use to smile at the thought of you, now a smirk struggles to raise a facade.

Where did we go wrong?

I cannot continue to manipulate happiness.

You introduced me to the stars, then left me in the dark.

I’m trying to rekindle the spark, but

its fading, fading, fading...

You’re so tame!

I wish you would fight for me:

Like rip the sheets off the bed, because

their touching me more than you are physically capable,

Like you don’t want to sleep with any pillows, because

You want my head to be pressed against your chest.

And

I count the rhythm of your heart beats.

We become in sync.

Make the sweetest music with our breaths, and then

come together again in our dreams.

My Love,

You use to be my solider now the words you drop mirror bombs.

Cold wars in the kitchen

Cold stares when you’ve been missing.

Folded arms no longer open for embrace.

Why are you acting so senseless, as if you’re emotionally bankrupt

and the place I had in you’re heart is now vacant, and being foreclosed – by You.

I’m faded.

I am everything without you,

we’re so much more when we’re together.

Birds of a feather — insert cliche].

I am naked and alone.

I’ve exposed myself to you !

You harbor the negatives and strip positives.

You’ve put a cloak over my emotions, and now…

I am no body to you.

Your clothes give me something to hold on to.

The cologne gives me feelings to remember.

I’m too hurt to eat these contradicting thoughts are my food.

Regurgitating truths.

We are fading

I didn’t have to see you sweat to know you were passionate.

Time is money and I’m still paying for your attention.

Love is nonrefundable.

We’ve already invested the time.

You’re dismissing me

And

I am missing you while I’m holding you in my arms.

Love is a battlefield,

I will win the war.

-Leighrick