Melancholy Lullaby

Days like these are usually harder than others. I sit and think, what man could I possibly allow myself love more than my father and my brothers?

When the walls stop listening and the paper begins to thin. Pens dry like wells – I continue throwing coins in. Always sinking to the bottom, in relation to my feelings.

Tho my foundation has been shaken, I remain standing on both feet.

Days like these I remember smiles were to keep from sobbing. When the loudness of my laugh echoed and filled the emptiness within. When I picked up the good book, and threatened to test the 7 deadliest sins.

I felt the most suspense. How could one live a unpredictable life knowing what’s coming next? How must it be handled?

I disguised myself and walked blind into a world full of misjudgements. With the thoughts of where I should be. What I could’ve done; what would I give it all up for? Maybe some selfish loving….

Seeking love near and far, but up close is where it’s absent. Filling hollowness with questions. Is my acting so good that you feel like your words mean nothing?

To me this is far beyond explanation. The smile on my face and the frown in my heart are not adjacent.

Who can replace the feeling of replacement? Wouldn’t that be replacing you and I with something unfamiliar?

As an artist we want to be heard, and since I was in 3rd grade, Ive been curious as to why Van Gough cut off his ear. Was it fear? If so – I can relate to that.

My blood boils on the contrary my breathes are flat. I have a plateau of dreams, but I keep taking steps back. Life is all about risks they say, but I’m bored of this game.

I’m aiming at the moon, since I cannot seem to catch the shooting stars. If I had a wish, for one night I’d like to silence these thoughts.

to be continued..

-Leighrick

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